Hi everyone,

I just started a job 7 months ago and got pregnant immediately as my husband didn't want to wait. Everything was going fine at work until I told them I was pregnant. They moved me to a new group where I would stay local (I used to travel before) and things just have been going haywire ever since.

I'm currently in a position where I hate my job. I hate coming to work and I feel my senior just likes to give me a hard time. What's worse is being a girl you'd expect her to understand, but she just doesn't. I don't know what to do, so many times I think of just leaving work. Plus they're also not giving me any maternity leave as as per the company policy I have to be an employee for at least 12 months to be eligible. I have 4 weeks of my vacation and they will only let me tak an additional 2 weeks unpaid. I can't understand how some people can be so inconsiderate???

I feel the pressure at work just makes me cranky most of the time and everyone around me says your mood affects the baby. I just don't know what to do. I feel everyone in the new department has ganged up against me to give a hard time. I know since the work is new I must be taking a little longer to do it, but then isn't there something as learning curve????

I'm close to 30 weeks and I've pretty much been miserable at work all through the pregnancy. I don't know what to do...should I quit??

Please help!!!! hopingfortejas replied. hey ,

i know how u feel, being a RCG and being in anew job, i feel the same way many times ...

i know of my firends who had been able to go back to work in 6-8 weeks and still have work-life balance ...though it would be difficult, it is not impossible ...

my only advice would be , if it is stressing u too much, then take alook back and see if the job is really worth it, if it is then go ahead or maybe just quit ..

i knwo it is easier said than done as i find my self in tha position often , but it is a matter of getting the priorities set right ....

take care and dont worry too much .... :)
-P archie replied. Shraddha,
Sorry to hear your emotional turmoil and no one can actually help you with this.
I can provide some thoughts in hope you will understand the situation.

Shraddha, even if you were employed with them for a year before getting pregnant they could be not-co-operative with their behavior and yet you or anyone can't say anything about them. Primarily because it's work place and they have their own goals and expectations from employee not the otherway around. Unfortunately this is the way jobs work.

Lets shed a positive side: you said you used to travel and soon after pregnancy announcement you have been moved to local department, you in fact owe a thanks to your employer for this shift. I don't think officials planned to move you to a gang who would work against your emotions. It's just that they did not wanted you to face more trouble and perhaps mishap from frequent travels while carrying baby. Does this make any sense to you.

You came to a new department with some expectations and they were already expecting something from you as well. It's just that when two parties expect there is no way to know who should be blamed.

On the other hand I would like to say, you are emotional and fair on pregnancy part. Blame your hormones to feel this way. Some emotions are normal and won't affect baby but you should try not to see it this way that people around you at work are helpless or they are troublemakers. Rather look at this way you have to be part of their team and make them appreciate you for your abilities and sincerity. I believe that little co-operation from yours and their side will make you feel at home even while at work.

About company policy and I can state a best example that I know. When I was teaching in college, I had a friend who joined lately. She was due in 4 months when she joined. The rule of Lectuer job is when you get Diwali holidays you are expected to sign on last and first (before and after diwalis vacation) working day otherwise your whole holiday time is considered non-paid leave for every single employee. This girl had more troubles, her spouse who worked in another city was putting her in measarable shape, he would come on the weekends and trouble her so much that never wished the weekend to come. She was from category and she wasn't well received by department, she also had more responsibilities offered than she would handle. Can you guess she delivered baby by C-section just two days before diwali holidays and she was forced to come from hospital to sign the attendance otherwise she would not get leave. Of course like you she was new and was in probation period where she could get fired also. She did come without any thoughts in mind. I was in tears when I saw here there with stiches and hospitalized situation. I was not from the same department, I offered some helping hand as I was living close by her house but trust me she got no help from department or husband. There are cases where situations could go worse.

Shraddha, if the rule is this that you can't get leave before one years employment nothing can be said. YOu will ask for non-paid leave along with vacation.

Get your husband to help you at home as he wanted to get you pregnant without thinking you are newly joining job.

quitting job is probably not a good idea. Because you really have not interacted them in phase without pregnancy, especially the group which is local and you think they gang against you.

Sometime your family don't understand or offer consideration why to expect it from strangers at work.

I am sorry, did not mean to lesson you but I thought of sharing my friends story and show you the vision of employer hope you will get me right and not mistake.

Tell each time just 8-10 more weeks to deal with them with this phase. Trust me their work pressure might get you exercised enough to help you have easy labor, which will be bliss for you.

Archie