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You are here Home > Love and Relationships > Articles

  What to do if your partner is avoiding you?- by Editor


Is your boyfriend or girlfriend avoiding you? Is your partner ignoring your calls? Read on to know what to do when a loved one ignores you.


Pooja and Manish met online through a dating website. They confessed their love for each other. For first few months everything was going good. Late night phone conversations, kisses and hugs, lying at home about a relationship and watching the sunset together, all felt so nice. Few days later Manish felt that Pooja is ignoring him. He confronted her about her behavior. She said she wanted to end the relationship. Manish did not probe too much and moved on.

Do you think Manish did the right thing? Moving on without knowing the reason of ignorance is not always possible. If relationship is stumbling, it is better to end it on a good note instead of making things worse. If your partner is avoiding you, having a word with him or her can improve the situation. There can be some misunderstanding. However, being pushy does not help.


Is he or she ignoring me?

When suddenly there is something wrong with your partner, when you feel everything is not okay, when you start finding loop holes in a relationship and when your partner ignores you, you know it is time to do something to save your relationship. Following are signs that show your partner is trying to ignore you.

  • Your partner does not answer your calls and avoid calling you back
  • Your partner spends more time with friends
  • Your partner avoids giving you missed calls or sending you text message
  • You partner does not look forward to meeting you and gives reasons
  • Your partner says that he or she needs some space
  • Your partner does not include you in his or her plans anymore


What to do if your partner is avoiding you

If you are sure that your partner is avoiding and ignoring you, you need to make a move. Do not overreact, do not be overanxious, the problem with your relationship might be trivial. Once you have identified the problem, it is time to bring it to the notice of your partner. Hard as it may seem and be difficult to do but it can save you many ugly moments.


Communicate

Communication, commitment, trust and love are the characteristics of a successful relationship. If your relationship is missing even one of these qualities, it may tumble. Love is like a delicate thread and open communication is the best way to keep the bond strong. If you are feeing that your partner is falling out of love, go and talk to him. Ask him why he is ignoring you. He may keep his cell phone switched off just to avoid you. Meet him in person. Avoid discussing things over the phone, through text messages, via e-mails or through chats. Do it face to face.


Seek explanation

Tell him that you have noticed that he is avoiding you and you need an explanation. Tell him that you would not go without getting proper answers to your doubts. Do not say something that will hurt your partner's feelings. You are still together. Your partner may be going through a bad phase. He may be depressed as he got rejected in the job interview or he is hesitating to tell you something. Find out the root cause of his behavior. Life will surely get on track once again. However remember you do not have to be forceful and keep calling every minute, demanding an explanation.


Give some space

Sometimes emotions are hard to understand. Give your partner some space. Leave him alone for a few days. When he will be okay, he will get back to you. Meanwhile spend time alone. Let your partner spend time alone so he will get time to know the situation in better ways. Do not argue or blame your partner. Do not say things like, ‘you have changed' or ‘you are not the one with whom I fell in love at first sight.'It is said, that time heals. Be patient and see whether things improve.


Think again

If you have discussed the reason for his disinterest in you, if you have given him enough time, if you have waited enough to improve the situation and nothing is coming out of it, then it is better you move on. Let go. If the person is the one for you, he will come back. Otherwise that person is just not meant for you. If it is clear that your relationship is going nowhere and is on verge of break-up, do not cling to it.

Believe in yourself and have patience. Avoid explaining to your partner how nice it would be to be together. Stay calm come what may, you will be glad you did. Trust yourself and go on with life. It is not worth a person who does not need or deserve you.


Is your partner ignoring you? Have you faced difficult situations in a relationship? How do you handle ups and downs of a relationship? To share your views and experiences,click here.

 
Feedback on article
Name: Poornima
City:   New Mumbai
Comments:   It is not good to jump on the conclusions. If your girlfriend or boyfriend is ignoring you there can be some problem. Talk to your sweetheart and discuss. Things can get better by having a word with your sweetheart. I am a single yet but I saw my sister undergo lots of ups and downs in her love affair. She was on the way to breakup but they managed to solve all the conflicts they were facing. Now their relationship has become more of a mature kind. Never try to assume things. Make things clear by directly talking with the concerned person. Do not involve an outsider to solve your problems. Of course you can take advice of those whom you trust. If nothing is working out then your partner might be giving you a hint that he or she wants to breakoff.

 

Name: Sundar
City:   delhi
Comments:   My story resembles with incident mentioned at the start of the article. I met a girl online. She was quite interested in me. We planned to meet. Everything was going nice. One day without any reason she started ignoring me. When I tried to call her she cut the call. I was almost in tears. I did not expect this from her. I really love her. The way she was behaving with me started affecting my studies badly. I scored badly in my semester exam and my parents were unaware about the reason behind my bad grades. One day I met her and asked to make everything clear. She said that she is dating someone else. I went mad but I controlled my self. It was perhaps my mistake. Later I started diverting myself by spending more and more time studying. I am still trying to cope up with my heartbreak.

 

Name: Dolly
City:   Nashik
Comments:   Last month I went on a family holiday to Delhi. I missed my boyfriend a lot during my trip. When I was on my way back home I realised that he has not sent me one sms or even did not call me. When I got back he started avoiding me. I was amazed to think what must have happened. As my parents know about our relationship I sought their advice. I called him over my place but he behaved as everything is okay, may be because my parents were there. Then after a week or so he told me that he did not want to continue a relationship. I was heart broken. I was shattered. I was in pain and tears. I cried and begged. But time taught me to move on. He gave me a weird reason telling me why he did break off with me. But for sure it was unexpected.

 

Name: honey
City:   cebu city
Comments:   for those who experience this kind of things just talk to your partner get a chair and set on it and both of you talked. if things still the same give time and space for each other. coz if he really loves you his going back to you. and not meaning your not really meant for each other.open up tell him what you feel.and tell him that your always here to listen to his problem. coz i experience it also. but now our relationship still going strong and full of love and happy.

 

Name: ashok
City:   delhi
Comments:   i loved a lot with my girlfriend.but she was so mean.and she destroed me.but still i love her.plez suggust me wat to do.ashok.

 

Name: akhok
City:   delhi
Comments:   im from badau from bihar.my father name is bade or pappu.i love my mosi.but my parents dont like this.i m working in a travell company.plez suggust me. ashok or chotu

 

Name: akhok
City:   delhi
Comments:   im from badau from bihar.my father name is bade or pappu.i love my mosi.but my parents dont like this.i m working in a travell company.plez suggust me. ashok or chotu

 

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Name: Renee
City:   Chicago
Comments:   but hwat if you cant get in touch?? everytime i try to call my girlfriend she is never around her cell phone. and she doesnt call me anymore. i miss her and the fact that she doesnt call me anymore scares me. i love her and if i lose her then i´ ve lost myself. what do i do if i cant get in touch to even talk??

 

Name: jasintaselvi
City:   shah alam
Comments:   My partner is disappeared,start on last year december till jan 8 he disappeared,he didnt even tell me his problem,i waited so long then i call his office try to get any information about him,his friends avoid to tell his address,i have call my partner number it says please call later,until 1 day i try talk to his manager not too detail but i said please inform him to call me its very important,he said he´ ll try help me then he gave me my partner´ s friend number,i call that number and ask,my partner´ s fren(a guy) he said my partner got a problem with his cousin,so he went to outstation,then i told to his friend that please inform him if whatever fault i have done i ask his forgiveness and i ask his fren to please help me to tell him to call me,then the next day my partner call me and scold me a bit he says why cant i wait for him and he dont like me to call his office,i got no choice,i dont know how to find him,why he disappeared,that´ s the reason i call his office,around 2 weeks he takl to me nicely,he´ ll call me,whenever i try ask him the reason why he is dont want talk to me like before he says he is busy on his own new business opening,he says nothing is prepared yet,on 16 feb i call him thru phone and he says his line is barred,he cant call me,then he says he have no money also,he says his pocket is empty,then i sak him how much he need to pay for his line,he said $800.00,tat much of amount i cant afford i said in my heart because im jobless,i was doing fair 2 weeks only,tat the job i get after so long search for job,i did not tell my partner that im jobless,because im scared he´ ll hate me,and now after 17 february he disappeared again,i dont know what to do,our relationship is 8 months already now until now i didnt know about his parents family details,he also didnt tell me and didnt bring me to meet his parents,while he was in contact with me i use to ask this question he keep on silent,it almost 2 months now he disappeared,i have intercourse relationship with him whenever i went to meet him,so many times we had that,whenever i try talk to him about marriage he keep on saying that he is not ready for that,he use to say that he got lots of problems to be solved,i know he have no car,motorbike even he dont have his own house also,he always use to say that he is rushing here and there for loan arrangement,in jan 9 whenever i call him he use to say that he is in singapore,sometimes johor bharu,sometimes kl,now he disappeared im still waiting for him,i use to ask him whether he got fall in love with another girl or not but he always says, he have no time for that all,he said that he even have no time to talk to me also,im really scared will he come back to me or he will disappeared just like that,in this situation i really confused i dont know how am i going to talk to him why he always disappearing without inform me anything to avoid my worries,i dont know what to do,i truly fall in love with him and i dont want to lost him in mylife just like my ex use me and dump me,this is my second love,i was happy that i have meet a new person who will understand me and will take care of me..i dont know how am i goin to take it if he also dump me just like my ex did to me,my ex did hurt me a lot with his poison words,that bruises in my heart not heal yet,if my partner also hurt me and dump me,im afraid that i´ ll do wrong things like suicide,sometimes i feel want to consume 5 packets of expired pills,all are different medicines..im still waiting for my partner,my parents are urging me to marry a guy of their choice and i have told them that im in love with my partner and we already live a life like husband and wife without marrying,my parents give me time until this coming april,because when my mother talk to my patner he said he´ ll come with his parents and will meet my parent´ s and he said will talk about our register..he said it on 2 feb,still no news from him,i try call his fren again and ask for help,his fren says he is still rushing for his own business start,his fren said my partner is very busy rushing for loan,i try ask to his friend whether he got any new girl in outstation,his friend said nothing like that,he got no affair with any girls his friend told me,im very scared,i dont know whether he is ignoring me or what,i got no oppurtunity to talk to him also since he disappeared,i keep on calling his number keep on saying not in service,i really dont know whether he have change his number or not,if he change also,i feel weird why dont he give me a call from his new number or send me atleast 1 sms,im really worrying..people which i shared my problem they make me more scared by telling he ignoring me because he got another gal already,recently on 3 feb i ask his picture so i can save it,something tell´ s me he will disappeared again..im always preying to god to bring him back to me..i feel jealous when other love couples are surviving without any problems in their love relationship,without any obtacles,their relationship are end in marriage,i dont understand why my love life is keep suffering,guy´ s doesnt matter but as a girl who losted virgin i am the victem again and again..i need any help please give me your opinion regarding my matter what i should do in this kind of situation..please

 

Name: jasintaselvi
City:   shah alam
Comments:   i got a call from my bf´ fren ( a guy) he says tat my boyfren has change his number,he scolded his fren not to give his number,my partner use to say tat he went to jb outstation for his new job arrangement but that´ s not true he was in kl he cheated to me he was in jb outstation..im weird y guys using innocent gal´ s n dump them,its really hurts..he run away from me..

 

Name: jasinta selvi
City:   Selangor
Comments:   I have found my bf new number,i call him n i purposely ask for him since i know its him who talk on phone with me,he talk to me like somebody else and said navin is not in..accually its him who was talking,then i was very angry,i was totally confused y he doing like this to me..he keep on cancelling my call´ s then i curse him,then he convince me tat he was just playing,n he says wanna meet me,i dont know for wat,then later on he started to talk about his ex gal jeyenti,then he says he doin his own business in singapore and he told me tat he had a affair with his boss ´ s daughter,he keep telling me tat his boss´ s daughter like him a so much,and he directly telling me next year he wants to marry his boss´ s daughter..he never regret tat he have used me for intercourse relationship n he started to talk to me like a fren,i cant accept him as a fren also,its really hurts me when i think the time i and him use to be together,i can clearly understands tat he wont married me..i feel devastated..is it women´ s faith to keep on get cheated by guy´ s..i started to have feelings not to believe guy´ s n love anymore..he never been sincere with me,he just want my body,he just want fun from me,but i didnt realised it once when we was on relationship..now i feel guilty why i trusted him and why i have intercourse relationship with him..his fren keep on telling tat my bf is very mastermind,he use to took my photostate of identification card and my a copy of my account front page,he says to his fren´ s sister in law which is my bf´ s close fren..my bf says to her tat he goin to steal everything from me and make me come to the street..i trusted him,he betrayed me,easily he keep on telling tat he goin to marry his boss´ s daughter,i cant tolerate it..i want be happy,and i dont want to fall in love with anyone anymore..its really hurts me..the article helped me whenever i feel devastated,depreased..i feel wanna cry but i cant do tat..if i cry i cant stop from crying,i´ ll be keep on crying..i trying to make myself stronger now

 

Name: Brandon
City:   mount vernon
Comments:   Hi, My ex dumped me! Love her so much and always did my best. She always came first to me. Made mistakes trying to talk to her shes gotten upset telling me shes scared leave her alone and move on. Her words! I never hurt her in any physical way. So i dont understand why shes scared i want her back. Id be so greatful for any good advise. Oh ya! Im 26 shes 30. Thanks ,BRANDON

 

Name: chandani
City:   kolhapur
Comments:   i dnt no he is aviding but wat to do now

 

Name: poonam
City:   Delhi.India
Comments:   i am facing same situation plz hel me.. i have alomost my self.. how can i tell him that now i want forgt you.. still love him so much..

 

Name: Josephine
City:   Kampala
Comments:   Dear Advisor, I am in arelationship ,my artner told me lies that he was going on abusiness trip after i had told him my medical condition,he decided to leave suffering,what can i do?Ilove him so much, i have failed to get him off my mind,hoping one day he´ ll come back.Please advise,what can i do?

 

Name: sandeep
City:   narwana
Comments:   pyar karna walo ki kismat kharab hoti h

 

Name: vishakha
City:   PUNE
Comments:   Quite ok

 

Name: vishakha
City:   PUNE
Comments:   dil to pagal hai usko sambhalna sehat aur niyat ke le atcha hota hai

 

Name: shiva
City:   hyderabad
Comments:   hi frieds mikosam one Neevu nishebdanga undu. Neevu sahashilivy undu. Niprema sankalpanni maruvaku. Adhimaruste nuvu nannu marachinatte. ninnu neevukuda marachi natte

 

Name: pallavi
City:   dyh
Comments:   me & my partner were good friends for about 1 12 yrs, then decided to get married. when everything was fine. he stopped taking my calls,its been 5 mnths im not able to speak to him. i just dono what to do. please help me.

 

Name: nitha
City:   chennai
Comments:   just leave hime he is not worth for true love

 

Name: kanchan
City:   chandigarh
Comments:   hi i met boy few days ago. he was friend of my friend´ s boyfriend. my told me abt him and she also told him abt me. he is tall and handsome. we met one day at my place. he wanted to kiss me at first meeting but refused.he is not belong from chandigarh. i said to him that day that this is our first meeting i dont feel like to kiss u. bt i like u. and wana meet u u again.after that he went back i didnt called him for two days after that i gave him a call and talk ed with him for long time.we started talking normal frndz but after sometime i liked him so much that am habtual to talk to him .and he also liked me. one day i told him tht i like u very much. i love to tallk to u. i am very happy with u. but i cant marry u in future. so i just want to spend happy moments and time with u whenever we talk and meet. no restrictions and tensions in our relationship will enter, and he also told me the same thing.we used talk whole night and day.one day he said that we talked so much that i cant sleep well and do my work prorperly.so plz talk less. i said ok. after that i come to know frm my frnd that he used tell our every conversation to her.i showed my feelings for time bieng we were together but he supposed that i am getting searious abt him. he started taking step back. he started avoid me . he talked to my frnd and told her every conversation.one day he said to me that i cant continue with u anymore. after 15 days he told me that he dont want to involve with any one. we kissed one day. at that day i remind those moments and cried a lot . after break up my frend had words with him and he said that she is means me ..., she is very irritated and typically girl . so i cant carry on with her. she used to ask me all the time do u love me,do u love me, i dont like all that. "so after listen all that am very disturbed and feel down that am i so bad and irritated girlfrnd. what should i do plz tell me. am very upset.

 

Name: GG
City:   VELLORE
Comments:   OK

 

Name: GG:DINESH
City:   VELLORE
Comments:   HI,KANCHAN PLS DN´ T SHW OR EXP UR FEELINGS TO ANY 1 TILL U GET MARRY AND DN´ T WASTE UR UNCREDITABLE LOVE AND AFFECTION 4 PEOPLE´ S DNT KNW ABT THE LOVE AND AFFECTION TC

 

Name: thiviyya
City:   New Delhi
Comments:   my lover is ignoring why? because when I AM touching in pubic place.

 

Name: rumba
City:   south africa
Comments:   advice on how to let go i need to stop calling, sms and emailing him how do i do it

 

Name: DONNAVILA MARIE B. PANDAY
City:   Baguio City
Comments:   I am in a relationship with an Indian, am not one... he is my first love but it is so hard to cope with him.I don´ t understand what he wants and i don´ t know if he really loves me

 

Name: maritha sedzro
City:   accra ghana
Comments:   This is to all ladies who are victims

 

Name: alia
City:   malacca
Comments:   i´ ve meet one guy....he such nice guy..we hook up together for couples of months..and one day he told me that he like me and wish me to be his wife.i told him to has a talk with my mom.he did it.he called my mom..and tell her that he like me and wanna to get marry with me...our relationship goin fine till one day he just disspear like that...whenever i call him...he never pick up.whener i text him.he never reply.i dun know what happened..because he kept silent..he keep everthin for himself.his silent is killing me deep inside..all his promise were gone by the wind.....all the word he used to said is just a knife stabbed on my heart...

 

Name: Partha Dutta
City:   Asansol
Comments:   My only love as well as sweetheart ignores me in strict manner without assigning any reasonable reason to me. But I have already made request her to come back several timesnot responding...Is this fair after passed a long duration (7 yrs.)?

 

Name: Akuaba
City:   Accra
Comments:   After sharing my finances with my fiance, I asked him money and after he gave me has refused to call me, text me or pick my calls. I´ m soo hurt. Yet I know life still goes on. We had fun and had planned marriage coming December.

 

Name: ciara
City:   kenya
Comments:   my boyfriend has ignored talking to me for four days now we had some fight two days ago have tried talking to him but he cant even give me a chance. this situation is breaking me apart even i cant concetrate at work i dont know wat to do for he is the love of my life. though i believe if somebody as meant to be yours you will be its all by mercys of God.

 

Name: Alvin
City:   Mangalore
Comments:   Myself and my girl friend were in love for almost 6 months. She previously told me that she had stomach pain and that when she consulted a doctor, doctor said that there is a growth in her uterus and there is nothing to worry in the future.. Even i was also happy hearing that. Suddenly something went wrong. She is avoiding me a lot. She wont reply to my msgs, she wont attend my calls.. Even she wont call me back. When i asked, she at last told me that we should better break up because she cannot bear a child. She told me that she was telling me a lie that doctor told there is nothing to worry in the future. Still i said, i am ready to accept.. Then she told me thats its a cheating on her part if we continue the relation. She is not coming to my way. But stil once in a day, she asks me ´ where r u?´ , ´ had ur fud?´ , ´ i love you´ etc.. But she is no more that old girl. I m afraid if she is telling me a big lie about her uterus problem. Can someone pls help me regarding this.. What should i do to get from her that old love and care. If the problem is true, i am ready to accept her happily.

 

Name: tina
City:   hb
Comments:   We had a fight because he did not want to go out with me for a few weeks. i told him I want to have another boy friend. then he asked me out again. so you have to be tough some times..

 

Name: ashley cosgrove
City:   new york
Comments:   a boy had proposed me few weeks earlier. i answeed him no but still he proposed me 6 times and i always said no. after 2 weeks he again asked me but i once i said no. but something happened i started liking Justin but now i think he will never propose me again. i love him more than myself. i dont know why. i adore him. he now doesnt even looks at me. last time i told my friend to ask his friend who her girlfriend is. his friend said its Ashley but Justinn said No. I dint have any Girl friend. i love him. but what to do now. i am left heart broken.

 

Name: melisa
City:   birmingham
Comments:   My boy friend usually plan with his friends when next to meet and spend lots of time with them .The only time he can spend with me is when his friends are not free .at first he didn´ t want me to hang around with him. We broke up and he came back to me again then we got back together again he asked me out we had nice time ,he also invited me to his house and we spend time in beD talking or watching a movie that was fantastic .when I felt like its too much being at his house ,I thought probably he may be using me in bed only and maybe he was ashamed to go out with me I confront him nicely to how I have been feeling ,he told me he don´ t have money and I asked him even to have a walk in the he said he is not an outgoing fancy

 

Name: Sarang Mani Agarwal
City:   Ghazizbad
Comments:   I am also facing a problem that might be ignorance from my gf but I m ready to do any thing for her. I love her very much and at any cost not want to loose her. She is so cute and kind natured but just misunderstand me sometimes. Also not give the explanations for any problem we face even though I ask her so many times. She not give her views about any problem we face. But nothings matter I love her too much and can´ t live without her. She is my life, no life without her will be possible for me. Plz suggest me the solution...

 

Name: dj
City:   raipur
Comments:   i love our girl friend but she leve me how to get her please advise me

 

Name: rahul
City:   udaipur
Comments:   friends we have relation of 3 years nd now i m so so so soo much posessive abt her and now i dont know that why she is ignoring me. i want to commit suside. but before i want to hear the true from her mouth. i love her a lot a lot a lot.

 

Name: himani
City:   india
Comments:   hi yr main jise pyar karti hu vo pehle ek playboy ke tarha rehta tha par aj tak usne kisi ko touch nh karne diya apne ap ko main uska 4saal tak wait karti rahi uske bd vo meri lyf main aaya par usne ek ladhki se pyar kiya tha uska naam arushi tha usse ladki ne usse dhoka diya uske bd usse laga har ladhki ek jaisi hoti hai vo mjhpe shak karta hai jabki maine uska 4saal wait kiya hai usne kabhi ni socha mjhe kitna bura laga jb usne kaha maine arushi se pyar kiya usne mjhe dohka diya plz bto main kya karun main bht royi usne arushi se pyar kiya mjhepe shak aur ab hum physical ho gaye hai plz

 

Name: Sachin sharma
City:   delhi
Comments:   Hey what 2 do my girlfriend is ignoring me and giving me d reason that her family knows about our relationship. I have given her diff ideas to solve the problem n its happening d same she still ignores me please help me what should i do....

 

Name: Sachin sharma
City:   delhi
Comments:   Hey what 2 do my girlfriend is ignoring me and giving me d reason that her family knows about our relationship. I have given her diff ideas to solve the problem n its happening d same she still ignores me please help me what should i do....

 

Name: kunal
City:   delhi
Comments:   main apni jaan se bahut pyaar karta hu aur wo bhi mujhse bahut pyaar karti hai. Hamare riste ko 3 saal ho gaye.usne mujhe cl 10 me propose kiya tha mai bhi usse bahut pasand karta tha . Hamari baat chalu ho gayi hum sirf phone me hi baate karte the kyuki uska ek bhi hai jiske karan hum kabhi nhi mil pate the bas use dekh pata tha. Mai aaj tak use touch nhi kar paya hu. Wo mujhe bahut chahti hai. Par pata nhi pichle 4 month se wo kisi aur se chup chup kar milti hai . Aur usse phone me baat karti hai. Kuch din pehle jab uske ghar koi nhi tha wo usse milne aaya tha . Maine dekh liya wo kehti h sak mat krna. Chalo thik h mai sak nhi karta par wo mujhe avoid kar ke usse milne jati h baat krti h . Mai kya karu mujhe bahut gussa aata h par mai use khona nhi chahta batav mai kya karu.mai bahut badi prblem me hu.. Plz help me..

 

Name: khabo
City:   NELSPRUIT
Comments:   i realy love hm bt wen i cal h either ignors or says his feeling sleepy. for what is worth im gonna leave hm bt its a fact i love hm. if he would come back soon i wont hesitate bt not later cos m also human i dsev hapines.

 

Name: khabo
City:   NELSPRUIT
Comments:   i realy love hm bt wen i cal h either ignors or says his feeling sleepy. for what is worth im gonna leave hm bt its a fact i love hm. if he would come back soon i wont hesitate bt not later cos m also human i dsev hapines.

 

Name: nene
City:   nashville
Comments:   well i been talking to this guy for a week and so and its doing good but lately he been acting phony and i dont know what to do i call him and text him and he didnt call or reply to my text he calls me wen he feel like it we cant even spend time together cause we both work so much and i wish we can spend time together he nice sweet and honesty but i just dont want my heart to be broken you know i wanna be happy not sad

 

 
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