You are Here : Home / Love and Relationships / Articles

Coping With Interfering Mother-In-Law


-by Editor




Does your mother-in-law interfere too much in your married life? She must be just doing it for the betterment of you and your husband. You can take this interference as an advice from your mother-in-law as she is an elderly and experienced house maker. Just take this issue lightly so that you can deal with your interfering mother-in-law with an ease. Read more.


You must have heard that marriage is not with one person, it is with the entire family. This is because you become a part of that family and so everyone and their likes and dislikes, attitudes and behaviour affects and matters. There are very few in this world that are fortunate to have a very cooperating and loving in-laws. The main problem is that everyone has his or her expectations from the new bride or the groom and the same is the case with the newly wed couple also.

However, there are problems in every family. Smartness is to deal with specific problems intelligently so that the relationship is also not harmed. Here are some tips that can help you tackle with your over demanding, disapproving and interfering mother-in-law.


Tips to Deal with Interfering Mother-in-Law

Mother-in-law problems are obvious. It is a very difficult and challenging task to make your mother-in-law an ally, but you can try some of the tips and you will certainly get positive results.


Do not Involve your Husband

Never talk about this to your husband. Husbands most often do not understand this interference because his mother is an important and integral part of his life. Even if he notices the interference he will not mind it or understand your perspective.


Always Be Nice and Affectionate

Involve your mother-in-law in things that can be really helpful for her. Mother-in-laws feel extremely unsecured when their sons enjoy their lives with wives or girlfriends. Try to get your husband’s favourite recipes from her and make it whenever you get an opportunity. Once your husband likes your preparation, your work is done.


Avoid Arguing

Avoid arguing as much as you can. This will help you stay calmed down and also help you keep the family from getting disturbed. If you find that your mother-in-law is interfering too much and is extremely demanding, try to avoid some of the not so important works that she gives you. You can make the excuse of being tired or forgetting the one. But remember, this you should do afterwards. There is nothing wrong in telling lies when that is not going to harm anybody and is beneficial for you.


Consider the Interference as Advice

If your mother-in-law interferes in small matters and she is only giving you advices that can improve your life, accept and appreciate it. Do not be at dagger drawn with your mother-in-law always. After all she is your husband’s mother and you owe responsibility towards her too.


Give Importance

Give importance to your mother-in-law. Most often it is observed that mother-in-laws interfere and become demanding just to attract attention from others. This is normal human psychology. Probably she is feeling unsecured and so you should pay attention and give some importance to her too.

These tips will help you get positive results only when the interference is nominal and natural. If you are not so fortunate and have a mother-in-law who is not ready to go of her rein easily, you might have to take severe and strong steps. You can keep her off from your internal matters and when she is unaware of what is going on between you and your husband, she will probably not interfere.

You can also change your location and start living in some other place. In severe cases, you can change the city also. Extreme steps sometime become necessary for peace of mind and for harmony in life. However, if you decide to live somewhere else, make sure that you do not shun away from your responsibility of taking care of your mother-in-law by leaving her alone.


Do you live in a joint family with your in-laws? Is it correct to argue with an interfering mother-in-law? How to make mother-in-law understand not to interfere? To share your experiences, views, and tips, click here.


(Please enter your correct email id to get notified when people comment on this article)
 
Change Image

Feedback on article

Name: Shweta
City:   Hyderabad
Comments:   Please help me how to deal with my motherinlaw i got married recently almost 1yr. My motherinlaw is taking all my new Sari , Suits, dresses ,and giving it to my sisterinlaw as she has to attend wedding I dont want to share my stuffs but I cant say NO to her...my sisterinlaw is wearing my clothes also she not talks to me but my motherinlaw gives my dreesses to her. Please help me out what I do how to say her NO so that shhe not feel bad too...

Name: sweety
City:   agra
Comments:   i dont think this article is true....by not involving husband and allowing things to happen wil only throw me into depression. Accepting ideas from mil is definitly a good thing....but if she is bossy, ordering things, talks to my husbamd secretly when i am away....such things irritate me.....when i talk gently..all she does is yell....i dont understand why she wantd her son to marry in the first place...if he was a bachelor, she could hVE taken decisions for him for the rest of her life...

Name: sweety
City:   agra
Comments:   i dont think this article is true....by not involving husband and allowing things to happen wil only throw me into depression. Accepting ideas from mil is definitly a good thing....but if she is bossy, ordering things,

Name: NeedAdvice
City:   Gurgaon
Comments:   I have a very interfering MIL who stays with me all the time as no one else can manage to stay with her. I have been trying to make her happy by giving up all my pleasures. We have never gone out alone because she would not like it. Every meal is prepared on her consent of what she would like to eat. If I prepare anything lese which she does not have the mood, I would get hammered like anything. Even for short periods when she is not there, she would ask what did we take in each meal. Everything in my household has to be as per her wish. I have been ignoring these things telling myself that if this makes her happy, let her do it her way. But what bothers me most is that she is trying to interfere in my relationship with my husband. Manipulating him by presenting distorting facts and making me look evil. Earlier he would not listen to her but for the last few days he has started believing her. Also she is teaching all the wrong things to my children like you can speak lies, that she used to come home by 11 PM and would not care what her father said to her, that she always does what she wants to whether it was approved by her father or not. I am very disturbed. I am thought of as a fool who preaches honesty, respect elders and follow their guidelines. I feel I am a total failure in life and want to end my life. Please advise what to do.

Name: salma
City:   unknown
Comments:   My MIL is always proving me wrong and someone who knows nothing.she is just annoying in all manners.

Name: salma
City:   unknown
Comments:   My MIL is always proving me wrong and someone who knows nothing.she is just annoying in all manners.

Name: Munzareen
City:   hyderabad
Comments:   Good ..

Name: madhu
City:   india
Comments:   My mil is vry intrfering not only dis frm d vry first day and much before whn our mrrg got fixed she ws not able to tolerate r togethness.now she has creatd such a situation dt has put me and my husband apart bcoz she acts as a kerosene in our quarrel.

Name: madhu
City:   india
Comments:   My mil is vry intrfering not only dis she acts as a

Name: StevenMl
City:   Ligatne
Comments:   Oakley Sunglasses Oakley Sunglasses Sale Oakley Sunglasses Oakley Sunglasses Sale Oakely Glasses Cheap Oakelys Oakely Glasses Cheap Oakelys

More
(Please enter your correct email id to get notified when people comment on this article)
 
Change Image

If You Like This Article
Contributors