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You are here Home > Love and Relationships > Articles

  Coping With Interfering Mother-In-Law- by Editor


Does your mother-in-law interfere too much in your married life? She must be just doing it for the betterment of you and your husband. You can take this interference as an advice from your mother-in-law as she is an elderly and experienced house maker. Just take this issue lightly so that you can deal with your interfering mother-in-law with an ease. Read more.


You must have heard that marriage is not with one person, it is with the entire family. This is because you become a part of that family and so everyone and their likes and dislikes, attitudes and behaviour affects and matters. There are very few in this world that are fortunate to have a very cooperating and loving in-laws. The main problem is that everyone has his or her expectations from the new bride or the groom and the same is the case with the newly wed couple also.

However, there are problems in every family. Smartness is to deal with specific problems intelligently so that the relationship is also not harmed. Here are some tips that can help you tackle with your over demanding, disapproving and interfering mother-in-law.


Tips to Deal with Interfering Mother-in-Law

Mother-in-law problems are obvious. It is a very difficult and challenging task to make your mother-in-law an ally, but you can try some of the tips and you will certainly get positive results.


Do not Involve your Husband

Never talk about this to your husband. Husbands most often do not understand this interference because his mother is an important and integral part of his life. Even if he notices the interference he will not mind it or understand your perspective.


Always Be Nice and Affectionate

Involve your mother-in-law in things that can be really helpful for her. Mother-in-laws feel extremely unsecured when their sons enjoy their lives with wives or girlfriends. Try to get your husband’s favourite recipes from her and make it whenever you get an opportunity. Once your husband likes your preparation, your work is done.


Avoid Arguing

Avoid arguing as much as you can. This will help you stay calmed down and also help you keep the family from getting disturbed. If you find that your mother-in-law is interfering too much and is extremely demanding, try to avoid some of the not so important works that she gives you. You can make the excuse of being tired or forgetting the one. But remember, this you should do afterwards. There is nothing wrong in telling lies when that is not going to harm anybody and is beneficial for you.


Consider the Interference as Advice

If your mother-in-law interferes in small matters and she is only giving you advices that can improve your life, accept and appreciate it. Do not be at dagger drawn with your mother-in-law always. After all she is your husband’s mother and you owe responsibility towards her too.


Give Importance

Give importance to your mother-in-law. Most often it is observed that mother-in-laws interfere and become demanding just to attract attention from others. This is normal human psychology. Probably she is feeling unsecured and so you should pay attention and give some importance to her too.

These tips will help you get positive results only when the interference is nominal and natural. If you are not so fortunate and have a mother-in-law who is not ready to go of her rein easily, you might have to take severe and strong steps. You can keep her off from your internal matters and when she is unaware of what is going on between you and your husband, she will probably not interfere.

You can also change your location and start living in some other place. In severe cases, you can change the city also. Extreme steps sometime become necessary for peace of mind and for harmony in life. However, if you decide to live somewhere else, make sure that you do not shun away from your responsibility of taking care of your mother-in-law by leaving her alone.


Do you live in a joint family with your in-laws? Is it correct to argue with an interfering mother-in-law? How to make mother-in-law understand not to interfere? To share your experiences, views, and tips, click here.

 
Feedback on article
Name: Sanjana
City:   Mmbai
Comments:   My mother is law interferes a lot between me and my husband. At a times my motherinlaw is also a cause of fight between me and my husband . I tried to avoid her behaviour many times, but is not possible to take such behaviour for granted.

 

Name: Radhika
City:   Chennai
Comments:   My motherinlaw is very supportive and understanding. She does not interfere between me and my hubby. However, many times I seek her advice and it is very helpful for me. For example, if I want to prepare any food item or snack for everybody, I ask her about which dish will every body like and prepare it according to her advice.

 

Name: Anuja
City:   Pune
Comments:   All women have same common misunderstanding that every mother in law interferes between her son and her daughterinlaw. It is not the same case all the time. Many mothersinlaw treat their daughterinlaw as their real daughters, so there is not question of such issues arising in family.

 

Name: Prashi
City:   Singapore
Comments:   I am getting married later this year and moving because of my father he should read this . He does much in good intent but is an intefering FIL in our realtionship. He is controlling by nature. I only thank god that my hus is just absorbing but not necessarily accepting what he does and he is very tactful in his dealings with this precarious, manipulating and interefing fil

 

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Comments:   My boyfrieNd nd I are dating for 5 nd a half years everything was ok until last year november we said we want to get married my mother in law wants him home early,she´ s constantly in between us.I came 2 a point were I dnt go there anymore. Everyting has to be her way and she wants him to build now so he don´ t talk bou marriage anymore! Pls advice me wat to do?

 

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Comments:   There is constant interference from my MIL.She needs every minutebit detailed report on the everyday activities and on weekends she is the one who decides our plans.We did not go on honeymoon, no going around in city....thanks to her.I am very depressed with this overinterfering attitude......

 

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