Parents are asked to be nice with their kids because it is necessary for success. However, there is a hairline difference between being nice and being a pushover parent. Read on to learn about the 10 signs that you are a pushover parent.
Today most of the parents lead a hectic lifestyle. Saying yes to things like ice-cream, one more TV show or one more video game is obvious. Even though you had planned to establish rules, habits and routines for your kids, after a long day at work you might not be having the stamina to create an acrimonious atmosphere at home. However, it is never too late to start. Just make sure that you have a proper session of making your kids understand when you start this especially if they are old enough to understand.
Common Characteristics of Pushover Parents
Have a quick look at some common characteristics of pushover parents.
1. Being Your Child's Friend
Nowadays parents are trying to behave as a friend to their kids. It may be good in one aspect, but it actually confuses the children. They need a parent to guide them and direct them to the right path. So, talking to your children and allowing them to share everything is good, but do not let them try pushing back.
2. No Limits or Routines
When you were pregnant you might have thought of raising a well-rounded child who would be obedient, confident, successful and happy. But, in reality, when you are tired and asked for any kind of favour, you let go things. However, you should set limits and be consistent in following whatever rules you established. Be calm and maintain a resolute attitude when your child tries to push over.
3. Handling Serious Issues Leniently
No parent wants to argue with his own child. This makes you unintentionally lenient. If you do not want any kind of conflict with kids, it is fine to let go few things. But you should stay tough on things that actually matters.
4. Allowing Kids to Make Excuses
Usually children avoid family commitments, neglect their daily chores or stay away from responsibilities making school work as their shield. By sheltering your children for avoiding works at home and school will only make them ill-equipped for future demands which they would face in adulthood.
5. Always Say Yes to Everything
You do not want to hurt your child's feelings and so say yes to whatever she wants and needs. This is going to bring more harm than good.
6. Insecure About Losing Child’s Love
Many parents give in to their child's desires because they feel insecure about losing their child's love. Remember, you are a parent and you only need to prepare your child to face the tough world with confidence.
7. Do Not Want Child to Fail
It is obvious you want to see your child succeed in whatever he or she chooses to do. But, allowing him or her to fail will help her develop a challenging personality.
8. Being Overprotective
Parents are overprotective and do not allow their kids to take risks. Kids gradually become completely dependent on them and try to pushover often. Parents also want to prove that they are good for their kids.
9. Look Polite and Respectful
Parents want their kids to know them as polite and respectful which leads to doing everything according to the child's wish.
10. Over-Apologetic
Some parents start their sentence with "I am sorry...". This makes them expect disapproval. Instead, start the sentence with "listen.." be firm to make your children accept their mistakes. Do not try to be a perfectionist. To be a successful parent, you have to be clear in your opinions and beliefs. Remember, disciplining your children is your responsibility and you should not escape from it.
What are the common characteristics of pushover parents? How to avoid being a pushover parent? What are the harmful effects of being a pushover parent? Discuss here.
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Being a pushover parent is the worst style of parenting. Parents must adopt a right balance between different parenting styles and they should know where to draw a line.
I agree with you Hemali, being a pushover parent can do more harm to kids than being strict with them. Children should be dealt with strictly when they are doing something wrong.
