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You are here : home > Raising Children > Parental Dilemmas > Maids and More

Maids and More

Maids and More

Leaving your child in the care of a maid does more harm than good. All your parenting ideals are sent for a toss. Children may show streaks of bad behaviour as maids usually try to discipline the children in a rigid way. What are other options for childcare? Read here.

All parents want the best for their child, and they often take pains reading parenting books or going through parenting websites such as these, to ensure their child turns out to be confident and well-mannered, and armed with all the tools they need to be happy and successful.

When we entrust our child to the care of a maid, we are entrusting her not only with just to feed our child and make sure he stays away from harm, but we are also inadvertently leaving a large part of our child's upbringing in the hands of this maid.
As a parent you have certain parenting beliefs. Some parents rush to pick up a child whenever he cries, because they don't want their child to develop insecurities. Other parents let a child cry it out as they don't want to spoil him. Similarly, some parents make it a point not to say no to their child, and would rather distract him.
However, when you leave your child in the care of a maid, no matter what your reason, you need to realize that all your parenting ideals are essentially sent for a toss. Just because you rush to pick up your child every time he cries doesn't mean your maid does the same.
Mala was very happy with her maid, and her child was with the maid all the time. Once the maid took Mala's son Vishal to another child, Aditi's house, and Aditi's mother was shocked at the way the maid looked after the child. This is not to say that the maid was mean to the child, but she certainly did shatter every parenting rule most parents abide by. The child was literally commanded to sit in one corner. If he tried to run around, the maid would shout at him and make him sit. She hit him, gently though, because he took a biscuit offered to him by his hostess, as it would soon be his dinnertime. A parent may have distracted his attention or let him eat half a biscuit, but the maid did not bother. He would try to run into another room, and the maid would grab him and sternly tell him to behave. A parent would have explained gently. Vishal has already started displaying streaks of bad behaviour. Every child is beautiful and unique in his or her own way, and it is up to the parent or caretaker to bring out the best in each child.

In this article


So what does one do?

Daycare

If you have a full-time job, you may want to consider sending your child to daycare. If you can find a good and reliable day-care, it may be a better option than leaving your child in the care of a maid. A daycare will have other children, they will all play together, and this will stimulate your child. In addition, people who run daycare centers are generally trained and educated. They will be able to read to your child, and will respect your parenting beliefs.

Camera

If daycare is not an option, keep a camera to monitor your maid. Correct her a couple of times, and if she doesn't improve, don't hesitate before replacing her. Your child is more important than the inconvenience you may have to go through looking for a replacement.



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Sita
Sita.14 years ago
this article is a real eye-opener. i was thinking about getting a nannycam installed, but was being lazy about it. i will do it at once now!
 
 
 
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neena
neena.14 years ago
sita,
where do u get nannycam in bangalore ? any idea ?
 
 
 
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Dinesh
Dinesh.14 years ago
my wife and i have full time jobs and a 2year old son. she had to go to work 8weeks after the birth of our child. we thank the option of infant care options available here as it helped us invaluabily. an 8 week old infant is'nt capable of expressing himself and even though a maid is a lasy she cannot replace the motherliness that the child deserves.

also the maid may not have patience and as cited in the article may hit the child (some parents like us believe in not hitting the child ). conflicts of interest occur. in a daycare we are testassured that not a hand is laid on our child.

the maid may also not have temper control loke the parents do and may hit the child too hard causing permanent injury.
 
 
 
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Sita
Sita.14 years ago
you can use a webcam.
 
 
 
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roshan
roshan.14 years ago
excellent piece of advice. i have a nanny at home, she is very warm and caring towards my baby who is 1-1/2 years now. but i still feel the parental ideals need to be instilled. so i as a working mother try to reach soon home to be with my baby and spent as much time i should with him. i read books, poems, play with him. so i think its kind of balanced.
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vg
vg.14 years ago
hi, this article is an eye-openor.where do we get nanycam in mumbai?i leave my baby with maid.
 
 
 
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ROSA
ROSA.14 years ago
nannies can be a nightmare. a day care is a good option since there more children there. they will have more play time and fun than being at the mercies of a nanny.
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shabnaam merchant
shabnaam merchant.14 years ago
my baby is 14 months n i m not happy with the maid's way of looking after the baby n ve also replaced 3 maids.pls adv if day care centers are safe for a 14 months baby.
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