Women first worry that marriage rings
the death knell on romance. Just when their fears have been confirmed or
not, it's time to worry again. They become pregnant and they think: "Does
motherhood spells the end of their sex life?" Somehow the word 'mother'
doesn't inspire amorous or romantic stirrings associated with candle-lit
dinners and impromptu bedroom trysts. This feeling is further reinforced
by the fact that most women find that they have absolutely no interest
in sex in the postpartum period.
No sex please,
I've just had a baby
There are several reasons why new
mothers feel less than sexy in the postpartum days. One of these is physiological.
A new mother's hormones are still out of kilter and this can affect her
sexual desire in the postpartum days and when she's breastfeeding. Hormonal
changes can also cause a lessening of vaginal lubrication, which is a further
impediment to enjoying sexual intercourse.
New mothers also feel a little fragile.
They worry that sex might be painful or cause some internal damage or even
lead to another pregnancy. In this frame of mind, they cannot be expected
to be ready to resume their sex lives. Couples eager to resume their sex
life should make sure that the woman is fully healed or she would find
sex painful. This may make her wary of trying intercourse again in the
near future and the stress will affect her enjoyment and also her husband's.
This would especially apply to women who've had an episiotomy or who've
had to have stitches.
Is there time
for sex?
Let's not forget that once baby comes
home, new parents aren't going to have a minute to breathe. By the time
they've fed, bathed, and clothed the baby, put him to sleep and done the
laundry, they just about have the energy to sink gratefully into a chair.
There's no way that they'd have the energy to even think about making love.
Sex is put on the back burner while they try to get a semblance of routine
into their lives again.
New parents' ardour is also cooled
because they are uncomfortable about having sex in the same room where
their child is sleeping.
A nursing mother's sexual needs may
be satisfied by breastfeeding as a result of which she may turn away from
her husband's overtures. In addition, some women feel uncomfortable with
sexual foreplay that involves fondling their breasts. They feel that their
breasts now have a nurturing function and are awkward about thinking about
them in a sexual context. Sometimes, breasts leak milk when stimulated,
which can make either or both partners physically and psychologically uncomfortable.
Name:
bundros
Country: Ghana
am quite inexperience because my wife just had our first baby. anyway, i think the site is okay on the education. i'll make comment s later when am also practically updated.
Name:
haritha
Country: India
hi,
its true,idont have confidence in opening to my hubby. i have a 8 month old baby, and we have not had sex since 15 months, my hubby is not at all interested in that ,but he was soo romantis 6 years before, i try to talk about it and he said he doesnot want to talk about it, and i feel ignored, and losing interest in marriage but i will stick with him for my childrens sake. do you guys thing he still loves me, he says sooo, and i trust him because of his care and talk, but regarding a simple kiss, hug and love making, its nill,
oplease tell me what to do.
Name:
giridhar
Country: India
that's true; but with a little loving foreplay and sensitivity the couple can have a sexually active parenthood. i think the erozonous areas are altered in the mother and the husband should be able to find the new ones. takes a lot of patience and persisitance, but can be rewarding. good sex is necessary to get out of the drudgery of the routine and to move your relationship forward, as it cannot be allowed to stagnate with the birth of the baby. this is a good site; thanks to those who took the effort to put it up.
Name:
Brandi
Country: usa
i find this true, i don't think i'm sexy any more. i've gained weight and i have extra skin. i feel like making love but i find it too stressful to even try and do it.
Name:
devisree
Country: India
yes,this is true.now i am facing the same problem of haritha.i think no solution for this crucial situation.
Name:
Mac
Country: India
any aunty in mumbai please mail me
Name:
asif
Country: Pakistan
pakistan iedes
Name:
Puja
Country: India
very true postpartum phsycological changes can be very striking.my partner and i had oral sex even the day before my delivery...we had a great sex life last 7 years....but suddenly after my delivery even simple sexual advances seem awkward to both of us....atleast i make a loving effort to kiss and hug him when he is back home from work....he does too sometimes...but it feels awkward nowadays.