Things You Must Do When You Feel Like Yelling at Your Kids
Are you unable to control yourself when you feel like yelling at your kids? Try the following tricks and find out how easy it is to avoid yelling at kids even when you feel like bursting out.Yelling at children is psychologically damaging and lowers your worth as a parent. Children who are exposing to yelling and shouting for a prolonged period of time either get inclined towards depression or dev
Are you unable to control yourself when you feel like yelling at your kids? Try the following tricks and find out how easy it is to avoid yelling at kids even when you feel like bursting out.
Yelling at children is psychologically damaging and lowers your worth as a parent. Children who are exposing to yelling and shouting for a prolonged period of time either get inclined towards depression or develop a rebellious attitude. Yelling is a negative way of expressing anger and often spirals the situation out of control. Child psychiatrists say that the tendency to shout will only go away with effective practice. Here are a few techniques that can help you stop yourself from yelling at your kids.
Escape from the Situation
If you feel that any situation is explosive enough to make you shout in anger then it is best to escape from it immediately. This could mean you transferring the responsibility of handling the situation on your partner. If your partner is in a more relaxed frame of mind then anyway the situation can be better handled by them. Get away from the scene and take a break to cool your mind. You could return the favour to your partner when they are on the verge of yelling at kids and this can work out to be a good symbiotic arrangement.
Communicate your Emotions
Learn to communicate your emotion of anger without raising your voice. Instead of yelling, say that you are getting angry at a particular behaviour or situation. 50% of the time this works and your kid will stop the offending behaviour. However 50% of the time your kids may retort back saying that they are angry too. When faced with this situation simply suggest remaining quiet for a few minutes to cool off the brain. After five minutes of peace both you and your kids will be in a more calm state of mind and the explosive situation will be diffused.
Set a Time Frame for Ending the Argument
The problem with anger is that there is no defined boundary on when the feeling will tide over and things will come back to normal. This is scary for kids as they feel that their parents (who are yelling at them right then) are never going to come back to being normal. This is not a healthy situation to be in so as a parent you could try adopting the following approach. Say that you are angry and might start shouting at any moment. In order to prevent that situation you are going to engage in some other activity (say for example doing the dishes) and by the time you are done in an hour you will not be angry again. This allows you to bypass the destructive process of yelling and also allows your kid to know that you will be back to your loving self in some time.
Try the Counting Exercise
When you feel like shouting or yelling at your kids then it is time to try the counting exercise. Simply start counting one to ten under your breath while taking deep relaxing breaths. You could also try telling your kids that you are on the verge of an angry explosion and are using the counting technique to calm yourself. This will make children more aware that the situation or their behaviour is not right and they will consciously start correcting themselves.
Music is a powerful antidote to anger. Keep your tracks of favourite feel good numbers ready and start using them in case of such explosive situations. Once the calming notes hit your head try humming along as this will engage your vocal chords and prevent you from bursting out in anger. Music therapy is what most psychiatrists recommend as a stress removing technique too.
Remember, yelling is not a healthy way to communicate with kids. Yelling can only harm the parent-child bonding. So, to avoid yelling at your kids try the above mentioned ideas or think of some other constructive ways to express your anger as per your convenience.
Why is it important to avoid yelling at kids? Which are the effective ways to avoid yelling at kids? What are the ill effects of yelling at kids? Discuss here.
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- The Indiaparenting Team