Does your child have a bad temper? Teaching your child to control his temper is one of the most valuable lessons he can learn.
A person with a bad temper is not in control of his emotions. Instead of ruling his emotions, he is ruled by them. Bad temper affects not just the nature of a person, but also the health. A person with a bad temper is more prone to high levels of stress, and is at a greater risk for developing cardiovascular diseases.
Also, he will get easily frustrated, and during times of frustration
productivity may go down too. In addition, an angry person has more
enemies than friends, and when the chips are down not many people will
be there to help him, or be by him side. And, finally, an angry person
is not a happy person, and needless to say, what every parent wants for
his child is happiness.
Here are some tips on how you can teach your child to exercise some self-control, so he is more in control of the decisions he makes, the action he takes, and the direction his life goes in.
Dealing with young children
The first and most important rule is to never give in to your child when he displays a bad temper. For example, if your child
Rohit wants a soft drink, and you want to give it to him only with his
dinner, don't give in just because he starts shouting and screaming. If
you give in, you only reinforce such behavior. Instead, every time
Rohit loses his temper,
punish him by sending him in his room, or making him stand in a corner
for around 5 to 10 minutes. This is possibly more effective than taking
away some future privilege, and it will also give your child
time to reflect on his behavior. On the other hand, if you keep arguing
with him, tempers are likely to rise even further, and you may be
tempted to either give in, or to deny him the soft drink at all.
Handling older kids
Stop the discussion when your child loses his temper. It is better if you let your child
know that you will be willing to discuss the issue after he cools down,
and only if he plans to have a civilized discussion with you. This may
be more effective with older children and with teens. So if your
teenage daughter wants to go for a party over the weekend and you don't
think she should go, if your discussion turns into a fight, don't close
the topic. Instead, tell him firmly that there is no point discussing
the issue now, and that you will discuss it with her later that night,
or the next day, if she can talk about it without losing her temper.
Finding a balance
Also, realize that your children are completely dependent on you, and
when you deny them something you may not think it should matter much,
but to your child, it may mean the world. Thus, your child will get frustrated and irritable. And, in an attempt to over-discipline your child, you may lose his trust. Be a balanced parent if you want a balanced child.
Name:
prasanna.lakshmi
Country: India
my 3 years son is very adamant and stubborn.he wont listen what we tell him,tried punishing him.he looks in to our eyes when he is shouted. he got no fear. he even gets angry when we laugh at him. at some time i loose my temper n hit him,which i should not do.but at that moment it just happen.its getting tough with him day by day.........really worried that ill loose his love. plz help me.
help me control my temper.
Name:
Medha Hegde
Country: india
my daughter is 4 years old and she has very bad temper, so no one plays with her properly. so she becomes more anger and hit them. i tried to convince her so many times but she doesn't understand instead she gets angry with me and aterts hitting me. please give me some more suggestions
thanks
Name:
Satish Nair
Country: india
my three year old son have a very bad temper. whenever some relative come with their children to my place, my son first he will play with them for a while. then after some time he start fighting and hitting them, he don't like sharing his things with other. i don't know i don't know how to tell him. please give me some more tips..... thanks
Name:
Big Mama
Country: usa
my 8 year old have a bad temper one mintue he is fine the next he is like a wild beast. his father is not in his life i really don't know if that have something to do with it. i don't know what else to do. i even thought about giving him up but i don't know what i would do if i loose him. he dosen't know his father's family he is taking care of kids that are not his. maybe that's my son's problem. i need help i don't know how much i can take
Name:
sapna
Country: india
dont get angry with her when she's already angry. instead, let her calm down first. ask her what is making her angry. have a peaceful discussion, and dont interrupt at the moment when she has lost her temper. dont shout at her for hitting other children. ask her gently why she felt she needed to hit them. ask her why they didnt play with her. let her come up with the answers instead of u telling her.
Name:
fairies
Country: U.S.A.
my four year old daughter has a bad temper, i try to be strict with her i punish her. she kicks and hits things, she doesnt hit people but she will hit the couch, the bed anything. i dont no what to do for her anymore. if anyone has any tips on what i should do please let me no.
Name:
Honey
Country: India
my son - 8 years has an awful temper; while i have been extremely patient thru his outbursts - it doesn't seem to work ; i'd definetely like to stay away any physical punishment; but can somebody tell me how do u handle temper tantrum??
Name:
Aparna N
Country: India
good tips! i would also like to add that when toddlers display temper, it is sometimes because they do not know how to verbally express themselves in the situation they are in.
Name:
cheryl
Country: Canada
i have a almost three yr old, he is a very sweet boy but when he does not get this way with somthing he either hits me or hits something else, he can also be violent with our cat. i do not know where he is getting this at and it worries me. i try everything with him sitting down, talking with him, putting him in his room and taking his things away,also putting him in corner..i have gotting to the point when sometimes i just let him have his way or give him what he wants and i know this is wrong...any tips for me would be great!! thnxx
Name:
shashi
Country: India
my 9 year old son have bad temper. he deminate everyone if not lesson him he was angry samml samll things. i tries t convince him many time but he doesn't understand.he is very intelligent but he not want study. in school always comes complaint about his behavours. how i can my son become polite, manneer, displine and take interest in study himself. he is study in 5th class. please give me suggestins. thanks