"Why can't you manage? " My husband
often asks when I grumble about his traveling. And now, when my son and
I are alone once again, I ask myself the same question. "Why can't I manage?
What am I doing wrong?"
The more I thought about it, the
more I came to the conclusion that it was just a state of mind.
All that
is required to run a house alone is a little organization, and a lot of
self-reliance. Though life becomes a little more hectic when your husband is out of town, it can still be possible for you to cope with ease.
The main problems you are likely
to face when you are alone are:
An emergency situation
Boredom
Here are some tips to handle both situations.
EMERGENCIES
Your child falls ill
Rule no. 1: Always be prepared for
an emergency! I remember the time when I had to disturb a friend at 2 a.m.
as my two and a half year old son was throwing up desperately and I did
not have the medicine handy. So now I stock up on all the basic medicines.
Of course if it is something that cannot be cured by a good night's rest
then take your child straight to the doctor.
Be sure that:
You have a ready stock of basic medicines.
You have your doctor's telephone numbers
handy.
You know the timings of his clinic and
have an alternative plan of action ready if your doctor is not around.
What happens
if you fall sick?
You could probably call a friend
to help you out with your child while you visit a doctor. However, if your
child is old enough to manage his/her own work, you could just order food
from a restaurant until you feel better.
The surprise element
Sometimes you could be really caught
unawares! As one of my friends was telling me, she woke up one fine
morning to find that her telephone had been disconnected - she'd forgotten
to pay the telephone bill! It could happen to you! And heaven forbid that
you've forgotten to pay your electricity bill!
Be sure that:
If you have a cell phone, you keep it
charged and switched on thoughout the night when you are home alone.
You keep a torch next to your bed, with
the batteries!
And finally, remember, whatever happens
-stay calm. All that is needed to handle a crisis is presence of mind!!
THE BOREDOM FACTOR
Although emergencies crop up once
in a while, boredom is more likely to be your main problem. How do you
keep yourself occupied? What do you do in the evenings? How do you keep
your child entertained?
I have a friend whose husband works
on a rig. As he is offshore most of the time, she has her own circle of friends who meet once a week, along with children. They organize outings
together on weekends, celebrate
birthdays and even have their own
'group' magazine.
Read
If you have the reading habit, borrow
books from a library both for yourself and your child. If you don't, now's
the best time to inculcate it. As most people will tell you, a book can
be a very good companion.
Go out
Make it a point to take your child
out every evening, just to the nearby park. Once in a while treat him to
some food at the local fast food joint around the corner, or take him to
visit a friend who has children his age. Sitting at home and wallowing
in self-pity will get you nowhere!
So the next time your husband travels
don't feel depressed. Instead, learn to use this as an opportunity to prove
that you are an independent and intelligent individual.
Name:
Anamika
Country: India
strength and courage are the only two essential requirements to handle anything all alone
Name:
esra
Country: USA
hi
Name:
juliette
Country: USA
my husband is gone 9 months out of the year. it's all about maintaining a positive attitude and nurturing yourself so you have energy to nuture your kids. it's not possible, however, to remain upbeat 24-7; that's why we need good girlfriends to commiserate with!
Name:
lakshmi Rao
Country: India
self-sufficiency is a must
for all,definitely for a home maker to feel independent not just when alone.
Name:
Radhu
Country: India
yes...truly said we should have the courage and strength to handle ourselves in such situations. this doesnt come all of a sudden and would definitely involve training our mind and intellect to cope with such a situation.
Name:
fun without dad
Country: Singapore
hey! my dad is the managing director of the asean reigon of his company and travells alsot. guess what i've realised ' dad is the spoilt sport in many instances ' . when he's away we have the most gala times and even though mom cribs about his travelling sprees she seems much happier. as mother and daughter we spand the most intimate and fun time together ...... though i miss dad when he's gone i see myself waiting for him to travell because then i can have all the fun i want.
Name:
Priya
Country: Germany
if your husband has to travel, he will travel irrespective of what you feel or how comfortable you are staying alone. this is life. so making a face or grumbling is literally wasting time. my husband travels quite often and i have a wonderful time roaming around with my 5 year oldson, in summer we even went cycling together quite a bit, when i get bored i simply go the indian shop and buy some dvds and watch.
Name:
monisha
Country: India
i remember when dad used to travel, mum had a blast with us kids. we would order food in and watch a movie, and never bother with cleaning and tidying up. and have mum share our bed. all the things which we didnt when dad was around. so, when my husband travels, i see to it that the kids have more of me too like my mum had done
Name:
alokananda
Country: india
i taught my son many types of board games like chess,karam,tic tic toe etc for time pass.
Name:
seema vohra
Country: India
i know that inner strength is required but iam still not able to get in that state of mind lot of other factors like the environment you are living in makes a difference especially if you are with non cooperative inlaws.pl help me
