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Aggressive Kids:need advice soon
2005-01-18
Name: mmm Hi, mine is a real major problem. Please, advice me. I feel I have failed in life. Please take time and give your opinion and your suggestions.
My son who is 8yrs old is a very tough guy. Off late, he is not studying at all. He is not completing his notes in school, while all other children in his class are writing. Teachers have told him enough times, but he is just not bothered. He doesnt mind taking punishments, but does not want to write. At home, he is not studying. He keeps whiling time away by seeing here and there or by playing all the time. He doesnt have the urge to do things fast. He is very slow in writing. He struggles to join words and read. I mean, he is not able to read any thing aloud like other children. He is not interested in anything. Be it play, studies, drawing, singing, music, games etc., He only wants to while away time without doing anything. Ha yes, he loves watching TV that too only cartoons. He doesnt even know to play with other kids. He keeps laughing for no reason while other children play properly. What is the problem with him? These problems are from his childhood, not now. Off late he just hates to write. Please tell me some alternatives. I am worried for my sons attitude.

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2005-02-08
#1
Name: Dr. Ramya
Subject:  consult a psychiatrist
dear mmm,
i insist u go to a child psychiatrist and have a developmental assessment done for your baby.they will guide you. but dont panic. your child might just feel difficulty in concentrating.consulting a psychiatrist is not shameful. so dont feel bad.
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2005-02-08
#2
Name: Dr. Ramya
Subject:  consult a psychiatrist
dear mmm,
i insist u go to a child psychiatrist and have a developmental assessment done for your baby.they will guide you. but dont panic. your child might just feel difficulty in concentrating.consulting a psychiatrist is not shameful. so dont feel bad.
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2005-01-20
#3
Name: G R D
Subject:  Try this
I will sincerely advise you to disconnect the cable connection at your home and tell your friends and neighbors to send their children to play at your house i have seen a similar story unfold in a nephews house even his son is mad about cartoons and i am disgusted
do away with the tv and wish you best of luck
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2005-01-19
#4
Name: Champ
Subject:  Aggro Child
Dear mmm,

U really have a problem at hand.....an eight year old who does not want to write is one thing but if he cannot read then maybe u wud like to take him to a specialist.

I am not a specialist but still wud like to try and address the issue -
Howz ur sons vocab? Is he a free talker? Does he understand wat his teacher dictate in class? Bcoz if answer to any of the above is negative then its simple, ur son has not built up his vocabulary or language skills so he cannot understand the language at the speed at which the class teacher is dictating.
Try making him write the same at home by requesting his teacher to hand over notes given one day.

Language skills build up eventually by the age of 3-4 yrs, children begin to understand spoken words, form sentences of their own by getting used to hearing the words and make mental images of words and patterns of sentences. but this happens if at both school and home there has been an effort to develop the skills....

Ur prob currently is too vague --- cud u break it down into specifics and also a bit of histroy of ur child so we have a proper perspective on this???

Was he like this from the begining?
He never used to pay attention in class?
Wat have u done for it?
Has he flunked classes?
Does he express his views in proper words/vocally?

rgds,
Champ
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2005-01-27
#5
Name: malini
Subject:  mmm
Hi,
Thanks for your interest shown.
Actually, my son was not like this all these years. Day by day, this behaviour is becoming more. His vocabulary is pretty good, at school, at play and at home. Paying attention in class, yes, he is just not able to concentrate on anything. He is all the time looking what other children are doing. And at school, everything is written on the board, while he has to copy from the board. He hates this to the core of his heart. When we parents teach him, he learns fast. Coz he is given indivudual attention. But when it comes to writing, he does not want to write at home also. If either of us sit next to him, he will write (very slowly)for our satisfaction. Why does he not write out of his own interst. We have tried out everything on him. We have tried out all options on him like being very lenient, friendly, give him gifts,rewards, allot him marks on a daily basis for his daily activities, being harsh, rude, punish him, disconnect the cable connection, scold beat him. NOthing seems to be useful on him. Sometimes we are so much vexed. But we continue as he is our child. We cannot leave him like that only. We have tried explaining him so many times in different ways. He has not flunked in any class till now. But from now, we are scared. We are thinking of changing his school also. And Yeah he does express his views well. He tells us if he wnats anything. His vocabulary is really good. That is not a problem at all. I personally feel, this behaviour is because we as parents are not able to spend much time with him. Neither of us can quit our job & sit at home. We are financially not very well off. So both of us need to work. But as soon as we are at home we are with him. We take really good care of him. But when it comes to studies, we are strict. Then what could be reason be???? Why is he like this. He very well knows what is good and what is bad. Plese suggest me.
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2005-01-18
#6
Name: ravi
Subject:  need advice
Hi,

Try rewards if he does his work correctly. Also talk to him if he has any fears or concerns at home or school. Do activities that involves both of you so that feels you and your words friendly. Play games which involves two players like chess cards etc and slowly get over his fears.
Do arts and crafts and let him lead the ideas for completing it.

Explain to him about the responsibilities of each member of the family and that each is doing his/her duties in time.

More ideas soon..

Thanks
Ravi.
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