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Manners and Discipline Topics..

 
You are here : home > Manners and Discipline > Disciplining Children > Actions Vs. Words

Actions Vs. Words

Actions Vs. Words

Parents sow the seeds of disobedience in their child from the moment they start saying "no" or stopping their child from doing something very often.

Discipline that is very strictly enforced doesn't do your child a whole lot of good in the long run. Your child will tend to do things behind your back, or he may not grow up to be a strong, confident person, as you have never placed a whole lot of faith in his ideas, and in what he wants to do. If you always ensure that he does things your way, he will constantly need to be guided and lead every step of the way. Such qualities do not make a leader.

Distract your child

Instead of actively preventing your child from doing something, simply distract your child. When you see your child picking up something from the floor and putting it in his mouth, instead of shouting at him, distract his attention by pointing something out to him or running up and tickling him, and so on.
If you command your child to stop something just when he is about to do it, the temptation to disobey is very strong, and soon he will start disobeying you or pushing you as far as he believes he can get away with. And then, as your child grows older and starts becoming his own person, he will be accustomed to opposing you to get his own way.
If you try distracting him instead of trying to get him to bow down to your will, chances are that he will be more likely to listen to you on the few occasions you do correct him.

"But then he will not learn!"

You don't need to stop your child there and then in order to teach him that something is not right. A better way to would be to explain to your child that he should not be doing a certain thing, at another time. So, tell your child perhaps when he is eating his dinner, that picking up something from the floor and putting it in his mouth, or eating mud, is bad for his health.

Actions speak louder than words

Reema would never come to the table when dinner was ready. Her parents would have to call out to her again and again, and she would finally show up when they were through with their meal. Reema's mother was tired of yelling at her, but nothing seemed to work. Finally, one night they informed her once that dinner was ready, and no one called out to her again. Reema wondered what was wrong, and when she finally reached the table, she saw the food had been cleared. They said she was too late and she could now have breakfast in the morning. She went to bed hungry. The next few times she reached the table on time, but a few days later, again she reached late, and the food was cleared. Her parents told her that it was entirely her choice - she could either reach the table on time, or she could skip dinner entirely. The result was up to her. Within a month Reema was reformed. Some parents cannot imagine letting their child go to bed hungry, but remember, the best way to teach your child anything is to show him that his actions have consequences.

"If it aint broke, don't fix it."

This popular phrase is something every parent should keep in mind. Unless your child is doing something that may cause him harm, don't constantly keep telling him what to do and how to lead his life.




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Gaurang Mishra
Gaurang Mishra.9 years ago
It is absolutely true that actions speak louder than words. My kid always comes to have her dinner late at night. Got to try the stuff mentioned here. Thanks!
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Riya
Riya.10 years ago
I need to keep telling my kid do this or do that....
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shweta
shweta.14 years ago
very true i completely beleive that children should be taught showing them the consequences of their actions from a very young age.instead of shouting and saying no a hundred times to show them the consequence of their actions 2-3 times works.children should be brought up according to how the real world works......there is a consequence for every action they make.
 
 
 
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Anupma
Anupma.14 years ago
there's so much to read about and learn from on this site, that i don't know where to begin! the tips on discipline have been explained so clearly and simply that i began to wonder why i did't think of the reasoning mentioned in them. but i want to know why many parental queries regarding schools and admissions have gone unanswered...since my daughter is almost 3 yrs old now, i have one specific query: what, if any, is the real difference in the quality of education provided by an icse and an ssc school? why are parents today thronging to the former kind of schools? do they give a child special adavantages later in life? how do their syllabii differ? i need information on good schools in and around malad (w), and kandivili (w), in wmumbai. i need to know when their admission forms will be out for nursery for june 2007 and the last date for admissions. what kind of documents should i keep handy? also, could you send me the names of the authors and publishers of these books: "how to talk so your child will listen, & how to listen so your child will talk" and "men are from mars and women from venus"
 
 
 
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mia
mia.14 years ago
my little boy is two .he is very determent and i find we are constantly correcting him ..especialy me and he seems to ignore me... i will try your way and hopefully it will work for us..
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